The Bobbitt Family Update

In a recent news broadcast, it was announced that Lorena Bobbitt’s sister Louellaw was arrested for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago.

Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena. She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable condition, and Louella has been charged with…..

A Misdeweiner! 🙂

Early Telephone Systems

After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, New York scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the New Yorkers, in the weeks that followed in California, an archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet. Shortly after, headlines in the LA Times newspaper read: “California archaeologists have found traces of 200 year old copper wire and have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier than the New Yorkers.”

One week later, The Sentinel, a local newspaper in Pennsylvania, reported the following: “After digging as deep as 30 feet in his pasture near the Juniata River, in Lewistown, PA., Bubba Mitchell, a self-taught archaeologist and graduate of Slippery Rock University, reported that he found absolutely nothing. Bubba has therefore concluded that 300 Years ago, Pennsylvania had already gone wireless.”

Thank God for Bubba.
Who said Pennsylvanians were hicks?

The Golf Course

Here’s a heads up on what not to say if this ever happens when you’re out on the course.

A foursome of guys is waiting at the men’s tee while another foursome of women is hitting from the ladies’ tee.

The ladies are taking their time. When the final lady is ready to hit her ball, she hacks it ten feet.

She goes over and whiffs it completely. Then she hacks it another ten feet, and finally hacks it another five feet. She looks up at the patiently waiting men and says apologetically,

‘I guess all those f…ing lessons I took over the winter didn’t help.’

One of the men immediately responds,

‘Well, there you have it, you should have taken golf lessons instead!’

He never even had a chance to duck.

Penguin Awareness Day

Hmm. Turns out, yesterday was Penguin Awareness Day. Now, we all love those little birds in their little tuxedos, and we love it when they waddle to the shore, jump in and fly through the water.

I just find it a bit funny that this day just happened to be on Obama’s inaugeration day……..A relation, perhaps?

Disrepectful??

Okay, so now there’s news about Barak Obama not showing some respect for George W. Bush as he gave his final speech, and dined at some expensive place with 12 other people. In that respect, you can read the entire article here.

And just for those of you that don’t have time to read the whole article, this picture pretty much sums it up…

The Dvorak Keyboard

Okay, so I’ve recently been wondering if there’s another way to type with my keyboard without actually physically changing the keyboard. After all, people in other countries with other languages must be able to use a keyboard, right? Even if they don’t speak American English? And is there a better way to type here in America? Even with our English?

I’ve always known about being able to change the keyboard layout in the preferences menu in Windows, but I’ve never really researched it and tried it. Well, now I have.

I personally have always hated the QWERTY board layouts. And now I’ve come across the Dvorak layout. Turns out, the QWERTY layout was contrived to slow down people’s typing in order to accommodate the typewriters’ capabilities in the mid-1800’s. Remember those? The long, hammer-like action?

Well, right around 1936, a man by the name of Dr. August Dvorak studied how people type and the letters that are most commonly used. He came up with a much better layout than the QWERTY keyboard. I’ve been playing with it for a few days now, and I can’t believe I haven’t used it sooner.

This entire post was typed with the Dvorak layout, and my keyboard was actually able to keep up with me. I typed this entire post in about minute and a half, versus the usual 3-4 minutes. (Not including thinking time)

I’ll be posting more on this, but if you like, you can check out some more info on the Dvorak keyboard layout here…

The New Prez Ride

Okay, had to share this one… Photos of the new Presidential ride are officially ‘out’. I’ve taken this article directly from AOL, so if you want to see the photos, you’ll need to go here.

—————————————————————-

Photos of New Presidential Limo Leaked
By Mike M. Ahlers and Eric Marrapodi
Copied from CNN

WASHINGTON (Jan. 6) – As a candidate, Barack Obama promoted hybrid cars. As president, he’ll be handed the keys to one. Sort of. Shortly after taking the oath of office, Obama will climb into the Mother of All Hybrids — part car, part truck and, from the looks of it, part tank.

In keeping with recent tradition, the Secret Service will place a brand-new presidential limousine into service January 20 to drive the new president on the 2-mile jaunt down Pennsylvania Avenue during the inaugural parade.

Already, spy photos of the limo — with patches of gray primer — have leaked out. And already, the reviews:

“Ugly as sin,” says one car enthusiast on an auto Web site. “Can’t we make a hotter ride for our prez?”

“Sheesh,” says another, “why don’t they just transport the president around in an Abrams tank.”

One news agency, noting its 8-inch-thick doors, says the limo can withstand a “direct hit from an asteroid.” But GM spokeswoman Joanne K. Krell laughed off the comments. “And it will fix you a latte if you ask,” she jokes. In truth, the new presidential limo is a Cadillac, Krell said, although it is “not a direct extension of any single model.”

“The presidential vehicle is built to precise and special specifications, undergoes extreme testing and development, and also incorporates many of the top aspects of Cadillac’s ‘regular’ cars — such as signature design, hand-cut-and-sewn interiors, etc.,” Krell told CNN.

“Cadillac is honored to serve and renew this great tradition,” she said. “And it is entirely appropriate that an American president has at his service a great American vehicle.”

For much of the country’s history, the Secret Service didn’t even drive the president, evidently oblivious to the dangers of asteroids.

In the post-Lincoln horse-and-buggy era, it was customary for a security detail to closely trail the president, according to a Secret Service history.

Something New

Well, I’ve entered my first local art show.  The Pinellas Park Art Society is having their 20th Annual Photography contest, and thanks to a friend who told me about it, I’ve entered.   I was surprised at the entry fees – only $8 per piece up to 6 pieces.  Three different categories – Black and White, Color and Digital.

Now before you ask, “Aren’t most photos today Digital?”, let me clarify.  The Digital category is for photos that are more than 25% manipulated, such as HDR and other ‘artistic’ ideas.  Just adjusting the exposure doesn’t count.  I have two entered in that category.

I have to say, I’m a little nervous.  I’ve been in other art shows, but this one’s local, so maybe that’s why I’m nervous.  Here’s a link to the Pinellas Park Art Society web page, so you can see what they do. There isn’t too much to their website yet, but I understand that it’s coming along. Non-profits can have a hard time getting these things up and running.

So go check out their site. The photography show opens on January 12th at the renovated railroad station in Pinellas Park. If you have nothing better to do, or want to get out of the house for a free event, come join us! And be sure to check back here – I’ll be giving updates on the show (specific times, results, etc.).

I have to say, I’m anxious about whether or not I’m getting a prize!

And an End to the Year

Well, I for one am happy that the year is almost over and time for a fresh start. So, allow me to end this year with:

Have a wonderful, safe and Happy New Year!

A Special Christmas Gift

‘Whatever you give a woman, she’s going to multiply. If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So – if you give her any crap, you will receive a ton of shit.’